The List: Novel by Patricia Forde; Only words people can say; A classic story of Noah and he Ark feat. catastrophe, survivors, new rules that're gonna help humanity survive and thrive and shit
Only thing is , survival requires the sacrifice of language. Ppl spend their whole lives knowing only 500 words, specifically chosen to support their careers: farmers know till, mulch; scientists know chemical, process; wordsmiths keep track of all the words, and haven't forgotten that there used to be more and that they used to be powerful.
I don't know what I would do if I couldn't use every word I know. My favorite thing behind cooking and sex and right before naps might be words, and it would take some kind of supremely jarring experience for me to sacrifice the hold they have on me, and I on them. in America in 2017 we're getting closer and closer to having to fight for them, to literally throwing hands for the right to speak truths. Like "The List"'s Letta, I'll fight for the freedom to use language how the fuck I very well please nahmean.
Protagonist Letta and the rest of Ark manage to do what their Lives require in this clipped, sad, sparse chirping called "List" ( as in "list of words you won't get killed if you say"), and are prohibited from enjoying anything that comes from or inspries emotion: no art, no music, and i think they're only allowed to bang like twice ever.
When this lil cute stranger dude, Marlo, shows up gunshot on her doorstep (typical) smelling like all kinds of herbs and shit, Letta (obviously a ginger) lets him in and stumbles a twisting web of lies and forgotten truths reveals itself to her. She learns about her family, herself, and just how far this Noah will go to "protect" the people of his Ark *wiggles eyebrows meaningfully*
Spoils: Ruins, or becomes ruined;
Riches earned.
So Marlo is the resistance (¡VIVA!) and his squad of orgiastic (not really) saxophoning terrorist refugees remember way back when, before global warming raised sea levels worldwide, so high apparently that it left only pockets of humanity stranded and squabbling for a meager existence.
Marlo and Letta are kind of a thing after she nurses him back to health, but never actually become one. the lack of an overt loveydovey plotline really felt like great restraint by Forde. It let the drama in the novel be the drama of what is fundamentally these people's cultural and literal survival, and I appreciate it.
Their "savior" Noah thinks that language is the root of all humanity's ills (after all, it was fancy words that dissuaded humanity from protecting earth before it was too late, smh) and he has a solution! Drop some poison in the water supply that erodes the frontal cortex and eliminates humans' ability to use language! adds up. Letta, Marlo, and the gang hatch a plot to prevent this bullshit. maybe it works, maybe it doesn't. read the book, dummy.
A huge thank you to Sourcebooks and Netgalley for allowing us to review this early. We were provided a free advanced copy in exchange for an honest review. Sourcebooks was kind enough to send us a set of poetry magnets to assist in our review. I spent 4 Doctor Who episodes working this out. See below =)
Style:
distinguishable traits
that thing Parker lacks
There's a lot of "oryx and crake" (Maggie Atwood) in here. thematic elements aside, there's a quietness, a sparseness that fits the subject matter. the 3rd person narrator is limited to just Letta, and the voice it attains feels genuine to my ear.
The Chronicle of Heloise & Grimple by Sean Gibson What I drank prior: I had a pretty long day of drinking. First we had Beer Olympics. WE came in 3rd, but that.... fine.... Then we all went out for a friend's birthday and drank/dance the night away. Currently in an Uberpool on the way home with a couple 21 year old swho think I'm 23. Which is really really really flattering. I'm hammert. Spoiler-free Overview:
How does one begin to explain this story. Sean was kind enough to send me a copy for review through Goodreads. He is a fellow DC public transportation survivor and active goodreads reviewer. We like him i guess (winky face).
This story was written in a unique way. From what i gather it was written on long commutes as a serial choose-your-own type thing. After each chapter Sean says "what'll happen next? x/y/z?" and then i guess people-of-the-internet decided.
Heloise & Grimple are on an epic adventure to make Grimple not ugly anymore. APparently Grimple has been cursed by... something... idk what... and they can't make his ugliness go away. They set off to set it straight. In hysterical fashion. Spoiler-free Thoughts:
This was probably the funniest story I've read in a long ass time. I'm not going to do my normal breakdown for this book, because this book is so not like anything else. Like, it's not super long, but it is FULLY action-packed, and unpredictable, and filled with laughs.
From hillgiants that don't look like hill giants to trolls (i think the one obsessed with Heloise was a troll... i can't look it up because i'm in a car) to evil, wizard... sorry Kevil, THE wizard, you get everytrhing. All the laughs, all the adventure, and it was exactly what I was looking for at the time.
You can get The Chronicles of Heloise & Grimple(according to GRs on Kindle Unlimited or on Amazin).
PS. Sean is awesome. The end.
PPS. I hear we get more soon?? I am pumped (and hammered, also hammered). Rating: 4.5/5 Shots What to pair it with: Tequila and Juice. I've been leaning more twoards that lately because I can down 'em in 2.8 seconds.
Until next time, I remain forever drunkenly yours,
Sam
I'm wild (wild thoughts) excited for #booziebookathon on TOMORROW, and even though I'm having wild (wild) anxiety about life rn, I've managed to plot what I'm reading and how I'm gonna defeat the Huns- er, these challenges.
I'm taking a different tack from the bookathon I did in may, and I won't spend my hours pounding through much Epic fantasy; instead I'm going to try to eat as many full works as possible. Ostensibly le list is like:
Saga #3-end by Brian K. Vaughan and illustrated by Fiona Staples (Book w/ a romance aka wine)(graphic novel aka tequilaaaaa uy uy also I might separately read Persepolis for this bc I saw it on Ginny's shelf uy uy ¡orale!)
Gathering of Shadows- V.E. Schwab (book w/ competition aka brewskies; book in another country aka vodka; book with pirates aka rum)
Map of Time - Felix Palma (book set in the past bka whisky) Shadowshaper and Shadowhouse Fall - DJ Older (middle grade aka Smirnoff shawty, nahmean)
White Boy Shuffle - Paul Beatty (book with a mythical creature aka absinthe),
Ancillary Sword- Ann Leckie (is just a cool ass book I'm looking forward to reading, so I'll have one of everything, please).
I think I'm hitting all my challenges (if only bc some books are hitting multiple targets, hehe, #tactics) and tbh I'm mostly excited to kick it with the willreadforbooze team. And quaff copious cups of quit-caring, amirite?!
(Editor's Note: See our announcement post here! We're excited for you to join us tomorrow!)
Hey everyone, it’s been a while. Between Utah and getting back home I haven’t felt like getting properly sloshed but my little sister is about to graduate and I’m partying it up with the parents so woohoo, plenty of mixed drinks including weird martinis and things that are blue enough that I don’t know what to think about them.
This book was Of Cats And Men by Nina de Gramont
Spoiler Free Review: So I’m not sure how much there even is to spoil here. This is a collection of short storiesand I’ll be honest, I’m not big into short stories. Mostly because I’m generally a sci-fi fan and there’s enough world building required for sci-fi that it seems a bit ridiculous to me to bother with all the set up and then only have a few more pages of actual story line before everything is neatly tied up. These weren’t short stories and I was really conflicted. It’s called of Cats and Men because each story features a cat and the woman who loves them. To be quite honest the cats end up being sidepieces to the relationships between the women and their inevitable husbands/boyfriends/fiance’s and to a certain extent I got a little bit tired of the women.
I’m not saying that there isn’t a place for dramas of the home. There is certainly a place for htem, but with a title like “Of cats and men” I was kind of assuming that it woudlb e something a little bit humorous, and instead we ended up with a bunch of stories about women in happy or unhappy relationships with their men and it felt a little bit trite. There was a story about a woman whose shitty brother and law came to stay for an extended period. There was a story about a middle-class lady marrying a blue-collar working and coming to terms with the kind of life that leads to. There was a story about a woman who had left her first husband, her second husband died and she’s still pining over husband number one (who, oh yeah, she had left).
For me it came down to none of the people being particularly likable. It’s been, maybe two weeks since I read this book and I can’t remember a signle character name. Honesty I only remember the shape of the stories. The one that I remember the most is the one where the lady mentions she skied back in the day and the only reason I remember that is because I was excited because I ski…. And then she ended up being a totally horrible person.
The one story that I wanted to hear more about was the woman whose family had taken in the brother in law. He had clear problems and the woman and her husband were clearly trying to be helpful without knowing the best way to go about it. The wife was irritated that her otherwise perfect life was going ‘not-the-way-she-planned’ while the husband tended to avoid the issues. But the brother in law left a door open and the cat got out… Considering they’re all short stories and it’s maybe 20 pages, and this particular plot point is clearly telegraphed I’m not gonna bother with a spoiler section. But this was the one story where I wanted to know what happened. The story ended with the woman searching for her long lost cat. There’s a question as to whether it will be found… or if it’s lost forever, or dead. There’s a question as to if that will be the final straw for the brother-in-law’s ‘temporarty’ stay… It’s the ones tory where all the characters felt fleshed out and real in a way that I wanted to continue looking at. One story out of maybe six isn’t the best return.
Rating: Like I said I’m skipping the spoiler free section. The stories weren’t connected and when each story is just 20-some apges long I’m not gonna bother. This gets 2 out of 5 stars. Some of this is my own prejudiceof just not enjoying short stories. I didn’t realize that’s what this was going into it, but I wanted to finish it. The stories were just a bit disappointing. The few that were interesting seemed to cut off just at the point where I would have otherwise started to care. The relationships seemed mostly uninteresting to me… For someone else, I could understand this book being enjoyable, but it didn’t fit me.
Drink Suggestions: Oh shit, I really don’t know. It needs to be something suitably stuffy. This book feels like whiskey on the rocks. But not good whiskey. It feels like the kind of whiskey that someone would buy after they’ve decided they wanted to acquire a taste for whiskey, but on a budget. A quick google search says Rebel Yell is a crappy Frat boy whiskey so I’m going with that.
Hey guys, I clearly stole this format from Sam, and we have very different ideas on how boozy is supposed to be spelled. Womp womp womp.
Will Read for Booze is hosting its inaugural #Booziebookathon on July 22nd! See our announcement post HERE for details and such.
Here are the challenges, and my TBR.
Saga by Brian K. Vaughan and illustrated by Fiona Staples This is a graphic novel that I've only heard good things about. Straight up, the people at my comic book shop (because of course I have one, and I take full ownership of it) rave about this book. It's one of the ones that they suggest to pretty much everyone (of a certain age, I believe there's a 'graphic' nature though I haven't read it yet so I'm not sure)
Challenges met: Wine and Tequila (interest mix, that)
Apprentice Witchby James Nicol Sam literally just read this and absolutely loved it. Basically she was the one who suggested that I read this, and I definitely trust her opinion at this point in time. It sounds like the main character is a witch who hasn't done so well on her tests and ends up going on an adventure because of it.
Looking for Group by Rory Harrison This is yet another book that I got from Sam (anyone noticing a trend here). She got this in a box and it sounds like it could be up my alley. A contemporary novel about a kid with cancer who appears to be in remission. He plays a lot of World of Warcraft, and has a crush on the girl he meets there. Also apparently there might be a boat involved.
Challenges met: Beer and Rum
The Girl Who Fell Beneath Fairyland and Led the Revels Thereby Catherynne M. Valente
This is the second book in this series. I read the first book at some point last year and it was a genuinely fun read. I honestly don't know too much about the sequel, but I figured now would be a great time to give it a chance.
See my review of the Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making here Challenges met: Rum (you know, in case Looking for Group doesn't quite cover it)
Satellite by Nick Lake Ahhhh one of the books we received at bookcon. It's always nice to start to work through these. A kid has been raised on a satellite orbiting the earth. For whatever reason they end up on earth and are going to have to try to survive.
(Editor's Note: We will be hosting a giveaway for this book! Follow us on Twitter @willread4booze for more details the day of!)
Challenges met: Vodka
I have no idea if I'm actually going to stick to this list, but it's always nice to have a plan. Hope you're looking forward to our #BoozieBookathon as much as we all are!
What I drank prior: I had 5 beers at happy hour. With no food. It's a thing.
(Editor's note: Well i feel like crap this morning...) Spoiler-free Overview:
So yeah, there's this girl, she goes for her witch's exam and she gets a weird reading. So because of this she ends up as an apprentice at this town called Lull. This town in the past has had little no no issues but as soon as our MC Arianwyn shows up so do a bnch of other things. There's a scary dark wood. We see a lot of signs that show it's a lot more than she expected and things go from there. Spoiler-free Thoughts:
I loved this book. Its very reminiscent of HP1 in that there's a villain, we don't know what it is but we know it's coming, typw of story. And the MC has a lot to overcome. Characters: The MC Arianwyn is amazing. SHe's very well developed. Her supporting characters... not so much. But her best friend, Salle, is cute. Her frenemy Gimma is super annoying, intentionally. Also, I love the 'adults' in this book. While we don't know how old Wyn is, its pretty clear who the 'adults' are. The district supervisor is sterotypically quirky but also fiercely loyal and i loved that. The other supporting characters are great too.
Plot: As far as plot goes, its pretty typical, there's a Big Bad they have to defeat. But what makes this story differnt is that we don't know what the Big Bad is until 2/3 the way through the book and it's not what you'd expect. I'm down for it. Also, I never felt bored. THe story was well paced and i gobbled it up. Writing Style: Pretty great. It's done well enough that i can see what's goin on without spoiling the story. I always love when that happens. Rating: 3.5/5 Shots. I loved it. Its a middle-grade story that will last throughout the ages, What to pair it with: Red wine. I love red wine.
COMMENT DOWN BELOW: What stories have you gobbled up recently?
Until next time, we remain forever drunkenly yours,
Sam
Will Read for Booze is hosting its inaugural #Booziebookathon on July 22nd! See our announcement post HERE for details and such.
Here are the challenges, and my TBR.
The Rose and the Dagger by Renee Ahdieh This is the sequel and concluding novel to The Wrath and the Dawn duology. I finished the first one during Dewey's 24H Readathon last April and I cannot wait to see how it ends. These characters are my precious children and I will fight anyone who comes near them.
The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Makingby Catherynne M. Valente Virginia read this last year and I've been trying to pick it up for a long time. This is a middle-grade story about a girl who gets an unexpected visitor claiming he needs her help to save Fairyland.
Paper Girls Vol. 1 by Brian K. Vaughn and Cliff Chiang This is a graphic novel I picked up at BookCon this year. I adore the Saga series by Brian K. Vaughn so I anticipate I will feel the same here. Paper Girls follows a couple of delivery girls who end up going on some adventures.
Challenges met: Tequila
Dividing Eden by Joelle Charboneau Twins fighting for the throne. Politics, tournaments, and much much more. Very excited for this one. I was recommended by Amber on Twitter (@dulivre) and I am pumped.
Challenges met: Absinthe, Beer
Let me know what you guys are planning on reading down in the comments below!!
Will Read for Booze has decided to pull together a 24-hour BoozieBookathon. We're a bunch of drunks (obviously) and we love reading (double-obviously) so we've decided to combine the two into a marathon!
Here's the deal - on July 22nd-23rd from 8am-8am EST we're going to be reading, and drinking, and posting, and tweeting. And its gonna be awesome.
Our hosts
ME,
The outrageous, notorious, and infamous Parker,
The lovely Miss Virginia,
and several of our bookclubbin' friends
If you're interested in joining us, please sign up HERE and use #booziebookathon on Twitter! We'll be following all day, hosting power hours (AKA reading sprints), and chatting all day.
We've come up with a couple challenges. You CAN double up on challenges, this is meant to be fun, not get the highest number of books. Also note that you don’t have to actually drink while your reading, nor do you have to actually drink the substance your challenge is for.
We are so excited to do this you guys and hope that you can join us in our boozie book adventure!
What I drank prior: It's Doctor night, I had a bunch of beers. Watched the season finale and cried a lot. Spoiler-free Overview:
How do i begin to explain this series. The Gentleman Bastards are a group of theives who plan elaborate schemes and then get themselves into so serious shit. Their fellow thieves start disappearing, the King Thief is getting scared by this person called the Grey King. He's taken responsibility for the disappeared folk. Locke gets wound up into this mystery and blackmailed into being directly involved. ALSO, we get to see the origin story of the orphan Locke and how he became a Gentleman Bastard by being taken under the wing of a Priest of the Thieves, Father Chains.
I obviously can't go into more Spoiler-free Thoughts:
These books are brilliantly bound. Each has its own plot arc but there's an overarching plot that spans all three books. Its intricate, well planned, well thought out, well developed, and just beautiful. Characters: I really enjoy these characters. Locke, Jean, the Sansa boys, and Bug make an excellent team of thieves. A well-oiled machine set to steal fortunes from the city's nobility. Capa Barsavi is a benevolent but also vicious ruler of the underworld. And the Grey King/Bondsmagi are worthy opponents. They are all well developed characters with unique arcs and growth.
However, notice how there are no women I mentioned? That's because there are no women MCs in the first book. Other problematic shit happens to women in this series which I will vent about in the spoilers. Just know there is problematic content but its not indigestable. In fact, I still love it regardles.. Plot: THe plot builds on itself and is intricate and well written. Locke is one of those #alwaysonestepahead characters and its executed perfectly. They try and continue the scheme while also dealing with a Bondsmage, a magician who can basically make you do anything by knowing your True Name (reminds me of Eragon). Also, the back story is very well done. I was as invested in the past as i was in the "present." Spoilerssssss
Alrighty. So I really loved these books. I loved Calo and Galdo they are my favorite, and I actually cried when they died in book 1. I loved the mystery and the scheming and the Big Bad Bondsmagi. I adored how no matter what, Locke just couldn't get out of trouble lol.
Book 1:
YO! Why are all the women plot devices? The twin girls were the sisters of the Grey King? Had to die. The daughter of Capa Barsavi? Had to die for the revenge arc. This mystery woman Locke is in love with? Doesn't show up. The wife of the noble they're duping? Stupid. All the other women? Hookers. ALL except one. She's the fucking villain. And not even a formidible one.
However, I really did love this book. It took twists that I was not expecting. The Grey King is VICIOUS. Fucking Vicious. I also really loved the Barsavi carpet story. Like, who thinks of that shit? The mystery of it all was so good. It was unpredictable and I loved it.
Book 2:
I really liked the original scheme in this one and I wanted it to work so badly. How cool was it to cheat at that alcohol game with a powder?? Because they knew their opponent was a gluttonous person (also a woman). Also, the guy who poison's them? What an actual dick.
But I like the sailing aspect. The Captain (a woman who lives to see the end of the book thank god) is awesome. The First Mate (a woman who again DOESN'T live to see the end of the book) is a brilliant partner for Jean. Poor Jean. He's usper smart but you've got Locke who's just determined to be a martyr or die for whatever reason. Locke bothered me at the end of this book. Also you have to have a cat and a woman on the boat or its bad luck? Brilliant.
Book 3:
I have so many thoughts on this book. Firstly, I HATE Sabetha. Hate her. With a firey passion of ten thousand suns. What a shit woman. She's #damaged which makes her #untrusting and #cruel. Uh, did she, or did she not, have the same upbrining as Locke? She came from the same place. Sure, she was raised with men/boys, but girl, calm your tits. I also hate the Bondsmagi Patience. I'm supposed to, but I really just want more than one woman I like who lives. Please?
Thirdly, I loved the game in this haha. It was so relevant considering we just had an election that had weird results. The pranks were super cute. The fact tthey could put aside their love for eachother (which is another thing i disliked - but only because it involved Sabetha) both romantically and platonically, and have it out? How neat is that. Also, this mystery that's scaring the Magi? Color me interested.
So.... can anyone tell me when book 4 is coming? I can't find it on the internet? I need it right now. Rating: 4/5 Shots What to pair it with: A great light beer. Like you keep drinking them thinking you're good and then all of a sudden you're hammered and you have no idea why.
COMMENT DOWN BELOW: What did you think of Sabetha? Do you enjoy a heist story when you know the plan or when it surprises you?
Until next time, we remain forever drunkenly yours,
Sam
(Editor's Note: Parker was on day 3 of a weekend bender. HS reunions, Booze Cruises, Birthday Parties.... He was hammered)
Blake Crouch fucked me all up with Dark Matter. I was hooked from the first chapter and sacrificed sleep, night after (exactly two) night(s) to read as much of it(all of it) as my called for. Dark Matter is a true scifi novel, bringing readers to learn about a science between the covers, but it's true strength is how it gets you to suspend your disbelief about the fresh learning you just did. plus, there are shootouts and makeouts and hypodermic needles and powerful, suspenseful drama to hold it all together. I love it because we meet characters and care for them deeply, and in the meantime, there are experimental phisics.. It's satisfying af.
Plot: our man's Jason is a physics professor in Chicago with a hot artist wife he knocked up 14 years ago their kid is a kid, or something, nbd.. Our Jason is smart but lazy; he chose family over accolades; he luh his family; he's a good fucking guy or something.. Then he gets like abducted, and funds himself in a world where everyone knows his name.. <·<. >·>. as someone else.. The like richest smartest boys besty pushingest physicist of all time. Hilarity ensues Writing style: Crouch takes us on a goddam worlwhind in this novel. The dialogue and world building both feel razor sharp and real, and they they fit eath other exqusitely. As much as Crouch gives us physics and metaphysics, he serves up punchlines like Serena Williams. The novel is FUNNY. Plus there's a roughness of tone and in the characters' personalities that reminds me of my friends and of nhow my friends talk.. Makes for reeeally consumable dialogue.
(Editor's Note: not actually Spoilers) Spoilers : these are shchrodinger's spoilers.. As soon as you read them, they disappear.
Pairing : lysergic acid diethylamide tincture in a cream soda.
Rating 4.967/5 shots of macallan single malt whisky, because this was perfect and I knew it, and even if someone does't know enough to appreciate all the intiricacies that make it such, they'll get a kick out of the wild ride this novel takes us on.
